Your Birthday Today:
Your crude sense of humor will offend many this week, while the amount you supposedly charge for a standard mustache ride will offend the rest.
Sagittarius: Although many wrestle with latent homosexual urges, you're the only one the stars know who likes to oil up beforehand.
Scorpio: You'll struggle to find a sympathetic ear this week when the FDA lowers its recommended daily intake of your goddamn bullshit.
Gemini: Your tryst with a married woman will come to an end this week when she finally asks you for a divorce.
Capricorn: Avoid confrontation at work today. Sneak up behind your boss and slowly strangle him to death.
Cancer: Everything will go according to plan, except for the injured hostages, the brief shoot-out with police, and the fact that you were just making toast.
Virgo: Your plan to commit the perfect crime is flawed in one important aspect: Sitting on the couch watching football all weekend is not illegal.
Taurus: Enlightenment and confusion will both be yours this week, when a tree falls in the woods only to make the sound of one hand clapping.
Aries: It seems that for every step forward, you take two to the side, three back, and then trip and fall off the side of a building, hitting the fire escape several times on the way down.
Pisces: Satan will take the form of Excel spreadsheet cell G-14 this week and refuse to assume the proper formatting.
Aquarius: You'll soon be struck by a painful realization concerning the relative force and speed of ordinary city buses.
Libra: They say that you're going blind, that your vision is rapidly deteriorating, but don't worry: They are just a coat rack and hat.
Leo: Some things just go together perfectly, but no one would've believed it was true about cocaine and rhinos until you came along.
thanks onion!
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
My President is Black.......God & Mr. Cox are too.
Today has been one of those days that you need every now and then to renew your faith in mankind and yourself. I watched Barack Hussein Obama become our 44th President and in the beginning of watching all of this unfold I shed a tear. I cried because I was thinking of all the hardships that Civil Rights Pioneers had endured in order to see a day like this take place when Love Wins and we as a collective nation said yes we can to change and stop being so indifferent to everything in life.
I was at work today and later on in the evening when I was working alone and a gentleman (whose name is Mr. Cox) came in and was looking for a bow tie and a dress shirt for a black tie affair. (I work in a predominately black mall at tuxedo shop if you didn’t know) He was an older gentleman probably somewhere in his early 70 (he told me he was 73). I told him I was watching the parade in the back on my laptop and told me he was excited about the whole day and he was happy that I was too. So, I asked him point blank, “sir, did you ever think this would happen?” his reply was, “no, I never thought a day like today was possible.”
He said “I grew up in Mississippi and was born in 1936 and moved to Chicago when I was 19” “When I was growing up we couldn’t get a table at a restaurant and when we wanted food from them they would pass the food through a window in the back of the building.” also “There were no public restrooms for us when we went places. If we needed to go to the bathroom we would go on the side of the road or in some woods.”
“One thing my father taught me at a young age was not to let all the words and things people say about you get into your head. He said don’t listen to what others say about you if you are something in God’s eyes then that is all that matters.” “My Father was a very strong man and was of sound character. He also told me that if you have hate in your heart you are only hurting yourself, because that person cannot feel the hate that you are putting on them.”
Another story that he shared with me was deep and really just awe inspiring it went something like this. “I remember one night when I was 9 years old our house got surrounded by the KKK, and they were yelling for my father to come out. My father said the front door is open you can come in but I’m going to take out a bunch of you before you kill me and my family. Dad had a hand pump shotgun on his lap and pistol in his hand down to the side.”
He also shared with me that he served in the Korean War. He was very active in the Civil Rights movement, and now he is involved in street ministry dealing with gangs in Chicago. When this man mentioned God to me it was only in passing, but it was one of those moments when you knew that his actions spoke more to me then T.D. Jakes could ever say in a sermon. It was one of those moments when your cynicism parts and you open your mind and listen with your heart.
Mr. Cox wasn’t really talking about being a follower of God; he was walking in full living action everyday of his life to be living the Gospel. It was incredible. This is man who truly believes that Love Wins, and if you know anything about MLK or Jesus those are two men who truly and whole heartedly believed that Love Wins.
Today was living proof. We have Barack Hussein Obama as our 44th President, and did so, on a platform of change and peace. I am a true believer that Love Wins, I just need to do so in action more so then just speech and print. Mr. Cox summed up how he dealt with racism in a very short and profound statement “Don’t listen to what others say about you. If you are something in God’s eyes then that is all that matters….. If you have hate in your heart you are only hurting yourself, because that person cannot feel the hate that you are putting on them.”
To Mr. Cox I owe a debt of gratitude and I am glad that we were able to share our joy and passion for the day together. Even though I do not understand all that he has been through, his stories and wisdom have touched me in a profound way, to where we both can unite together and pronounce……..LOVE WINS.
Sincerely,
Icy Mike.
I was at work today and later on in the evening when I was working alone and a gentleman (whose name is Mr. Cox) came in and was looking for a bow tie and a dress shirt for a black tie affair. (I work in a predominately black mall at tuxedo shop if you didn’t know) He was an older gentleman probably somewhere in his early 70 (he told me he was 73). I told him I was watching the parade in the back on my laptop and told me he was excited about the whole day and he was happy that I was too. So, I asked him point blank, “sir, did you ever think this would happen?” his reply was, “no, I never thought a day like today was possible.”
He said “I grew up in Mississippi and was born in 1936 and moved to Chicago when I was 19” “When I was growing up we couldn’t get a table at a restaurant and when we wanted food from them they would pass the food through a window in the back of the building.” also “There were no public restrooms for us when we went places. If we needed to go to the bathroom we would go on the side of the road or in some woods.”
“One thing my father taught me at a young age was not to let all the words and things people say about you get into your head. He said don’t listen to what others say about you if you are something in God’s eyes then that is all that matters.” “My Father was a very strong man and was of sound character. He also told me that if you have hate in your heart you are only hurting yourself, because that person cannot feel the hate that you are putting on them.”
Another story that he shared with me was deep and really just awe inspiring it went something like this. “I remember one night when I was 9 years old our house got surrounded by the KKK, and they were yelling for my father to come out. My father said the front door is open you can come in but I’m going to take out a bunch of you before you kill me and my family. Dad had a hand pump shotgun on his lap and pistol in his hand down to the side.”
He also shared with me that he served in the Korean War. He was very active in the Civil Rights movement, and now he is involved in street ministry dealing with gangs in Chicago. When this man mentioned God to me it was only in passing, but it was one of those moments when you knew that his actions spoke more to me then T.D. Jakes could ever say in a sermon. It was one of those moments when your cynicism parts and you open your mind and listen with your heart.
Mr. Cox wasn’t really talking about being a follower of God; he was walking in full living action everyday of his life to be living the Gospel. It was incredible. This is man who truly believes that Love Wins, and if you know anything about MLK or Jesus those are two men who truly and whole heartedly believed that Love Wins.
Today was living proof. We have Barack Hussein Obama as our 44th President, and did so, on a platform of change and peace. I am a true believer that Love Wins, I just need to do so in action more so then just speech and print. Mr. Cox summed up how he dealt with racism in a very short and profound statement “Don’t listen to what others say about you. If you are something in God’s eyes then that is all that matters….. If you have hate in your heart you are only hurting yourself, because that person cannot feel the hate that you are putting on them.”
To Mr. Cox I owe a debt of gratitude and I am glad that we were able to share our joy and passion for the day together. Even though I do not understand all that he has been through, his stories and wisdom have touched me in a profound way, to where we both can unite together and pronounce……..LOVE WINS.
Sincerely,
Icy Mike.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Obama is my Ace, but seriously get off the mans dick.
This a monumental occasion for everyone, and by everyone i mean EVERYONE. the guy at 87th and the Dan Ryan selling Obama airbrushed T-shirts, Obama Socks, Obama Condoms(its a new world out there rap it up!lmao.), Obama Buttons and Obama Stocking Caps(it is chicago). it gets better i turn on the T.V. and what do my eyes see, Barack Obama selling me some un-minted limited addition 100% silver plated coin with my man painted on the back, and if you call in the next 5 mins, get an Obama Dinner plate with Obama Hot Pads.
I mean this is all fine and dandy, but this needs to stop at some point. To whore out a mans image and name to this degree is absurd. Also like Van Said on www.superill.net some people don't need to rep for obama. if you have a fucked up attitude don't rep for the man, i don't think he would appreciate it much. certain rappers who mention "i've got a black president" and in the same line talk about guns and trafficking drugs in the same song should just kill them selves.
I am excited that we have such an amazing person who is going to be our president for the next 4 year(hopefully 8). we finally have someone who can speak and act presidential to represent all of us as a collective nation. I just don't want my president to be treated like Super Bowl XLIII champion the Arizona Cardinals where all of this merchandise is pumped out. It is fine for a football club, but don't continue to make a coin off of a mans name, because if someone did that to me, i would punch them in the balls.
I mean this is all fine and dandy, but this needs to stop at some point. To whore out a mans image and name to this degree is absurd. Also like Van Said on www.superill.net some people don't need to rep for obama. if you have a fucked up attitude don't rep for the man, i don't think he would appreciate it much. certain rappers who mention "i've got a black president" and in the same line talk about guns and trafficking drugs in the same song should just kill them selves.
I am excited that we have such an amazing person who is going to be our president for the next 4 year(hopefully 8). we finally have someone who can speak and act presidential to represent all of us as a collective nation. I just don't want my president to be treated like Super Bowl XLIII champion the Arizona Cardinals where all of this merchandise is pumped out. It is fine for a football club, but don't continue to make a coin off of a mans name, because if someone did that to me, i would punch them in the balls.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
I don’t have my shit together and neither do you!!!!!!
I feel like no matter where you are at in life I don't think you ever really have IT TOGETHER. I mean in some aspects of life yes, but as I whole I don't think you do. Because if you really have it all together what aspects of your life do you need to improve on or learn new things?
there have been points in my life where I thought I had it together and then I was shook to the core and realized that I didn't, and I think it's in those moments that you realize how delicate life really is, and it is in those moments you can become grateful what you do have.
Recently in July I was given my own store to run and I knew I wasn't completely ready, but I didn't want to say no to a nice new promotion and I wanted to show that I was all that my District Manger said I was. Well, my DM got fired in October and I realized that I might be up for the chopping block.
November comes and my Assistant Manger is temporarily transferred to another store and I am given the AM from hell. It was horrible and I hated working in the store so I asked to step down as store manager and they happily obliged. I was very angry that they did the demotion so fast, but I was happy because I knew I wouldn’t have the same pressures and responsibilities.
It wasn't a matter of that I didn't believe in myself it was more a matter of I didn't know enough about managing to be in that position. I'm glad I got the experience to be a store manager, but I am happier being in a backup role then a star position. I'm more a Scotty Pippin to someone else’s Michael Jordan and I am happy with that role. I am the SP to my wife’s MJ role. Real talk. It’s always very important that you know what your role is in life. I can make the playoffs, but I’m not gonna get anymore rings without the help of my ace.
I think part of what I do is I don't really look toward the sunny side of life, because that is crazy. Life doesn't always have a silver lining to its dreary 21 day overcast. Life can be so weird and strange that there is no logical explanation or rationalizing what is taking place at that moment. Having a great sense of humor will carry you through the rough times in life. Laughing at your mistakes and pain is healthy.
Being grateful for a shit sandwich can be tough, but sometimes you just need to laugh at the size of the shit sandwich and move along. If you mope about all the shit that life hands to you, you might as well just end it. Because, life is too damn funny to let stupid things bog you down.
Being grateful is one of those oddities that you might not always have the foresight to do, because hindsight is 20/20. lol. I can always look back on past experiences with a type of clear vision that I understand why I went through it.
I meet people very easily its part of who I am. I have friends that I keep in contact with regularly that I met 12 years ago for one week at a church camp. I got married to my wife someone I me at a church weekend over 7 years ago. I have friends that I consider some of my favorite people ever that I met through a BBQ get together here in Chicago a little more than 1 year ago. My Saint Louis family has introduced me to some of the illest people ever! Thank you Bobby, Eddie, Van, Rhashad.
I owe all of that to not having my shit together. If I had all of my shit together I wouldn’t be able to a lot for new experiences. I wouldn’t have room for more personal growth and I certainly wouldn’t have room for more friends. I will never have my shit together and I wish the very same thing for you.
Sincerely,
ICY MIKE
there have been points in my life where I thought I had it together and then I was shook to the core and realized that I didn't, and I think it's in those moments that you realize how delicate life really is, and it is in those moments you can become grateful what you do have.
Recently in July I was given my own store to run and I knew I wasn't completely ready, but I didn't want to say no to a nice new promotion and I wanted to show that I was all that my District Manger said I was. Well, my DM got fired in October and I realized that I might be up for the chopping block.
November comes and my Assistant Manger is temporarily transferred to another store and I am given the AM from hell. It was horrible and I hated working in the store so I asked to step down as store manager and they happily obliged. I was very angry that they did the demotion so fast, but I was happy because I knew I wouldn’t have the same pressures and responsibilities.
It wasn't a matter of that I didn't believe in myself it was more a matter of I didn't know enough about managing to be in that position. I'm glad I got the experience to be a store manager, but I am happier being in a backup role then a star position. I'm more a Scotty Pippin to someone else’s Michael Jordan and I am happy with that role. I am the SP to my wife’s MJ role. Real talk. It’s always very important that you know what your role is in life. I can make the playoffs, but I’m not gonna get anymore rings without the help of my ace.
I think part of what I do is I don't really look toward the sunny side of life, because that is crazy. Life doesn't always have a silver lining to its dreary 21 day overcast. Life can be so weird and strange that there is no logical explanation or rationalizing what is taking place at that moment. Having a great sense of humor will carry you through the rough times in life. Laughing at your mistakes and pain is healthy.
Being grateful for a shit sandwich can be tough, but sometimes you just need to laugh at the size of the shit sandwich and move along. If you mope about all the shit that life hands to you, you might as well just end it. Because, life is too damn funny to let stupid things bog you down.
Being grateful is one of those oddities that you might not always have the foresight to do, because hindsight is 20/20. lol. I can always look back on past experiences with a type of clear vision that I understand why I went through it.
I meet people very easily its part of who I am. I have friends that I keep in contact with regularly that I met 12 years ago for one week at a church camp. I got married to my wife someone I me at a church weekend over 7 years ago. I have friends that I consider some of my favorite people ever that I met through a BBQ get together here in Chicago a little more than 1 year ago. My Saint Louis family has introduced me to some of the illest people ever! Thank you Bobby, Eddie, Van, Rhashad.
I owe all of that to not having my shit together. If I had all of my shit together I wouldn’t be able to a lot for new experiences. I wouldn’t have room for more personal growth and I certainly wouldn’t have room for more friends. I will never have my shit together and I wish the very same thing for you.
Sincerely,
ICY MIKE
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Why Soulja Boy is good for music...and why you should shut up.lol
why do you hate this young man so much? is he really that bad for what he does? he makes music for teens simple and plain. He is not an abomination of hip-hop at all. look at Rappers Delight by Sugar Hill Gang and tell me what that song was about? Money, cars, women and flossin. those lyrics are classic to recite but talk about absolutely nothing. some of my favorite songs are about ABSOLUTELY nothing and are just fun to listen to. I.E. Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey by Paul McCartney.
A lot of people hate on this lil dude and they need to shut up and realize that you are getting old. I did not like Crank Dat, but it's only because that song was played 10 trillion times back to back. it is what anyone could want from a pop song, catchy and a nice lil dance to go with it. Do i listen to his music ever? no. it is not my style, but just because i don't like doesn't mean that other can't enjoy it for what it is. shit i love Haddaway and that has got to be one of the dumber songs out, same with Right Said Fred.
He is not destroying hip-hop, it's not his fault that his music sells to teens. teens usually have bad taste in everything(sagging pants, night gowns for t-shirts, tight ass pants, douchey looking hair cuts, douchey 80's throw back clothing) but that is because i am getting older. the fat boys, dana dane, dougie fresh, skee-lo, the rapping duke, kurtis blow pretty much didn't rap about anything, but they made hot singles for the club (because most radio stations didn't play this stuff at the time) and it was all about fun. nothing really socially conscious came out till "the Message" by Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five. everything before that was pretty much dance singles like Soulja Boy.
so in other words, don't hate on an 18 year old for making money in this pure crap driven commercial music business. it's not his fault that crappy music sells to slow MTV teens. at least he doesn't fake being a gangsta like Lil Wayne, Rick Ross or any of the other bullshit down south rappers. Lil Man get your MC Hammer on and make money. just don't fully live out like MC Hammer where you try to go gangsta, go bankrupt, become a pastor and then try to rap again. be you lil homie and cater to your audience. thats why LL has lasted 24 years in the game, because he makes records for the ladies and makes dance singles.
Not everyone can be a J Dilla or a Black Thought. J Dilla is one of (if not THEE) the illest producers EVER and my personal FAVORITE period. Black Thought is one of dopest emcee's ever to be constantly slept on as one of the Greatest, and he is in my top 10. His style is like no other, same with Dilla. Always original often imitated never duplicated. Originality and pure Art don't always appeal to the masses, that's why you have Thomas Kincaid bullshit compared to someone like Marcel Duchamp. pure highly mass marketed shit to someone who is a Genius when it comes to innovation. draw the parallel.
sincerely,
Icy Mike.
A lot of people hate on this lil dude and they need to shut up and realize that you are getting old. I did not like Crank Dat, but it's only because that song was played 10 trillion times back to back. it is what anyone could want from a pop song, catchy and a nice lil dance to go with it. Do i listen to his music ever? no. it is not my style, but just because i don't like doesn't mean that other can't enjoy it for what it is. shit i love Haddaway and that has got to be one of the dumber songs out, same with Right Said Fred.
He is not destroying hip-hop, it's not his fault that his music sells to teens. teens usually have bad taste in everything(sagging pants, night gowns for t-shirts, tight ass pants, douchey looking hair cuts, douchey 80's throw back clothing) but that is because i am getting older. the fat boys, dana dane, dougie fresh, skee-lo, the rapping duke, kurtis blow pretty much didn't rap about anything, but they made hot singles for the club (because most radio stations didn't play this stuff at the time) and it was all about fun. nothing really socially conscious came out till "the Message" by Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five. everything before that was pretty much dance singles like Soulja Boy.
so in other words, don't hate on an 18 year old for making money in this pure crap driven commercial music business. it's not his fault that crappy music sells to slow MTV teens. at least he doesn't fake being a gangsta like Lil Wayne, Rick Ross or any of the other bullshit down south rappers. Lil Man get your MC Hammer on and make money. just don't fully live out like MC Hammer where you try to go gangsta, go bankrupt, become a pastor and then try to rap again. be you lil homie and cater to your audience. thats why LL has lasted 24 years in the game, because he makes records for the ladies and makes dance singles.
Not everyone can be a J Dilla or a Black Thought. J Dilla is one of (if not THEE) the illest producers EVER and my personal FAVORITE period. Black Thought is one of dopest emcee's ever to be constantly slept on as one of the Greatest, and he is in my top 10. His style is like no other, same with Dilla. Always original often imitated never duplicated. Originality and pure Art don't always appeal to the masses, that's why you have Thomas Kincaid bullshit compared to someone like Marcel Duchamp. pure highly mass marketed shit to someone who is a Genius when it comes to innovation. draw the parallel.
sincerely,
Icy Mike.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Fuck Impeachment, I'm running for a third term!
Everyone and their mother is talking about my Illinois Governor Roddy Blogo, and i for one am really impressed by this man. Roddy was Impeached early today a narrow margin of one vote for him to not be Impeached and i am impressed that this man did not punk out on me. He made it very clear with his speech about how amazing he is that he will run for a third term and win.
He is my new hero, i haven't seen this much ball power since Cheney shot his friend in the face with a shotgun. I love in the video where he talks about that they wanted to impeach him in the summer of 2007(finally got the chance and did) even though he is doing such amazing things in the state.
One of his projects was standing on stage and he forgot which disease his Gubernatorial Power told to get the fuck out of his body. Then he talks about a lady that got screened at a Pink Pot Luck and found out that she had stage 4 brest cancer (i'm going to go ahead and assume that she died, for the fact he didn't talk about her recovery and only talked about that she was diagnosed for free, so then she could know what killed her.) and was able to recieve free screening and treatment.
He also put a special spin on how special intrest goups and lobbyist have hurt the state from moving forward with some of his plans(one of the reasons he was under investigation in the first place.) i.e. how he contracted out the Illinois Tollway construction, and getting health care for people.
In this whole 10 minutes about nothing he doesn't address the reason why he is being impeached and tells people he will get to there questions in a minute. so not only does the Bush Administration deflect and have a total disengagement from reality, so does my Governor. He goes for a jog in the snow while he is being impeached, and doesn't realize that you can't sell the Senate seat which the President-Elect comes from, and that is why he is my favorite person of the moment. Thanks Roddy Blogo, for absolutely nothing.
sincerely,
Icy Mike.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
our sex life is boring......lets choke eachother!
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Saturday, January 3, 2009
Fuck Israel..........
yeah i said it. what are you going to do about? I'm so tired of this shit it is insane. Anytime a Palestinian fires a rocket into a building and kills an Israeli, Israel retaliates and kills 100 Palestinians per. This shit has got to stop. seriously. It brings me to tears that people think that Israel is doing good by KILLING ITS OWN PEOPLE. Everyone will agree that the country of Palestine does not exist. So, by geographic land marking BOTH the Gaza Strip and the West Bank happen to be in what country?????????? thats fucking right, ISRAEL. So, if you support Israels quest to exterminate Palestine you are an advocate for ETHNIC CLEANSING and i don't want to hear shit out of your mouth about how bad of a dictator Sadam Hussein was, or Robert Mugabe, Idi Amin, or Omar Al-Bashir. Israel has been killing it's own people for damn near 60 years, and something like 500,000 Israelis have been murdered by Israelis. So, congrats to you fucktards that don't know the history of the region and are pro-Zionist, ethnic cleansing, apartheid loving dumb fucks. do us all a favor and kill yourselves real hard.
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